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a hostage to my thoughts

myuntoldnirvana

a thousand thoughts flicker in my mind like city lights

so immortal, so loud

lurk in disguise like a predator

my mind the prey

sit still, a hostage to my thoughts

the greatest of kings in histories

set tyranny over me

over my spinning head and feet stationary

set abode in this insurmountable melancholy

in forlorn musings, the walls of horizon contract

suffocate a thousand smiles i was yet to have

a stranger at bay, and still a stranger at heart

never knew myself like i was an art

woke up a widow, a death of myself

an elegy for my angst and lament

a prayer for a life undreamt 

in tears of the years i have left

as a prey, as a subject, as a widow

i never wake up, i never sleep,

am i my thoughts?

i wonder in every heartbeat.

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